The lost art of picking up the phone

In short

• Why young lawyers are terrified of picking up the phone – and what really sits underneath that fear.
• The one sentence that instantly reduces the anxiety of not knowing an answer on the spot.
• Five easy leadership habits that transform phone-shy juniors into confident communicators.

In an era when young lawyers are more likely to text than have tough conversations over the phone, law firm leaders need to create a culture in which phone communication feel safe and normal, writes Leonie Green.

Do you remember a time when you feared picking up the phone? Have you noticed this fear in others more recently?

I grew up in the early 1990s, when the phone in our house was a single landline attached to a cord. We didn’t have one of the new cordless phones I saw on American TV shows. I remember calling friends and knowing I’d probably have to speak to someone else first – usually a parent or sibling – before getting to the person I wanted.

Sometimes those calls were nerve-wracking: wondering who might answer, whether I’d get through at all, or if I’d get my friend in trouble for calling too late. But after hour upon hour of conversations through my teenage years, I became completely at ease on the phone. It was how we communicated when we weren’t in the same room – just part of day-to-day life.

Despite that, I remember being a junior lawyer and dreading phone calls. I’d answer, but my heart would race each time it rang. Even after years of phone use as a teenager, I still hesitated when it came to calling clients. I’d overthink it, rehearse it and still put it off.

One day, I admitted this to another lawyer, a few years ahead of me, who quickly helped me get to the heart of it: I was afraid the caller would ask a question, and that I wouldn’t know the answer.

She normalised that fear, admitting she’d once felt the same. Then she smiled and said, “I learned to have a few lines up my sleeve to make me feel more confident, such as, ‘That’s a great question. Let me think about that and come back to you.’”

She reminded me that clients call because they don’t know the answer, and they value thoughtful, considered advice. She also reassured me that my fear of not knowing was entirely normal – a common feeling for new lawyers who believe they’re meant to run before they can walk.

That was a turning point for me. I realised I didn’t need to know everything on the spot. I just needed to listen, think and respond sensibly. I didn’t need ready answers, just a few ready lines that made sense in context.

Suddenly, the phone was easy again. The fear was gone.

Listen and learn

This was also back at a time when working from home, for junior lawyers or even senior ones, simply wasn’t a thing. I worked in an office where I could hear client conversations happening all day. Without realising it, I was constantly exposed to social learning: listening, absorbing and picking up cues from how others communicated.

So, when several senior lawyers in sequence recently raised concerns with me about their junior lawyers’ discomfort with phone calls, it made me wonder whether this is a new issue, or an old one showing up differently.

Sure, today’s juniors and mid-level lawyers are mostly digital natives: more comfortable with texts and emails than with phone calls. Many have also spent formative years working remotely, where social learning can still happen, but far less by osmosis. They haven’t had the same hours of exposure to overhearing how others speak with clients – the rhythm, tone, or even the pauses that make conversations effective.

And, of course, some of the same old fears remain: the fear of being ‘found out’, or seeming unprepared when they don’t know an answer.

Why the fear can run deep

For many junior lawyers, the fear of not knowing isn’t just about confidence. It’s about identity. University often rewards precision, certainty and being right. The workplace, however, demands judgment, curiosity and the ability to navigate ambiguity. That shift can feel like going from top of the class to the bottom rung overnight.

In a profession where expertise equals credibility, uncertainty can feel like failure. Without psychological safety, the sense that it’s okay to say “I don’t know”, early-career lawyers may hesitate to ask questions, admit uncertainty, or pick up the phone when unsure.

What leaders can do

As leaders, we have a powerful role in shaping the cultural and environmental conditions that make phone communication feel safe and normal again. We can:

• model the calls – let them hear how you approach client conversations (tone, pacing, empathy, pauses). Not just advice calls, but the social and connection part of phone calls too.
• normalise not-knowing – reinforce that curiosity, reflection and thoughtfulness are part of the role – not weaknesses.
• stay curious together – ask what’s getting in the way of them picking up the phone and what might help them feel more confident.
• be patient, without lowering expectations – remember that newer lawyers have a phone-hours deficit compared to us; they need time to build that muscle.
• foster a learning culture, not a perfection culture – encourage practice, reflection and growth over flawless first attempts.

One more thing

Here’s my full disclosure: there are still some calls I don’t enjoy making. Sometimes I’ll write an email instead, or I put the call off until I am feeling completely ready. Think about where you might do the same, and share that with your juniors.

We’re all learning human beings. When we normalise that, we create an environment where it’s safe to practise, stumble and improve. Like any core skill, using the phone well takes time, feedback and repetition – and a culture that values learning as much as knowing.

Leonie Green is the founder of Conscious Workplace, a consultancy that partners with business and law-firm leaders to align people strategy with business strategy. Leonie began her career as an employment and industrial-relations lawyer in private practice, then moved into senior corporate roles including HR director. With more than 20 years’ experience working in and with the legal industry, she is an accredited organisational coach and workplace mediator, and facilitator for the Legal Practice Management Course at the College of Law, Victoria.

Leonie.Green@consciousworkplace.com.au